The Art of Decision Making: When Do We Let Our Children Make the Decision?

Allowing our children to grow and learn to make their own decisions is sometimes a hard thing for a parent to do…after all, we know what’s best. Right? Usually, that’s true. But if we always make decisions for our children, what do they learn? And what happens when they get older and the decisions are much more important – maybe even life threatening? Read on to learn two mothers’ thoughts about children and decision making.

One mother told me: “My husband died when my son was 16 years old. I guess my son was trying to grow up fast and begin making his own decisions. We always had the same fight – he wanted to grow his hair long and I wanted it cut short. My daughters kept telling me to stop nagging him about it and he’d eventually cut his hair. I felt that since I was the mother, he should wear his hair the way I wanted. Well, I finally gave up the nagging, and sure enough he cut his hair. I learned that he was, indeed, trying to grow up and make his own decisions.”

Another mother said that when her children were very small she would take them to the dime store so they could shop for something with their allowance. She told them to be very careful about what they chose, because there would be no exchanges or returns. They learned to take everything into careful consideration before making their purchase. She said it’s good to teach them on the little things when they are little. As they grow older and have to make decisions on more costly things, they’ll be better prepared for it. And she’s right!

As a parent, sometimes we have to “put our foot down,” other times it’s better to go by the old adage of “picking our battles.” Either way, that’s where our decision comes into play.

Thanks for reading — and keep smiling!

Carol Schmidt

Carol Schmidt

Carol Schmidt is the mother of three grown daughters and has always said the most important job in the world is that of a parent. For years she has asked a very important question: "If you knew then what you know now..." She is excited to share with others the insight she has gleaned through the years.
Carol Schmidt

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Carol Schmidt

Carol Schmidt is the mother of three grown daughters and has always said the most important job in the world is that of a parent. For years she has asked a very important question: "If you knew then what you know now..." She is excited to share with others the insight she has gleaned through the years.

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